Hostgator: A Great Hosting Site, When They're Not Taking Your Site Offline

Since HostGator pulled my site down, I've had time to ponder, write and ponder more.  This is my most recent experience with what happens when something goes afoul with a shared hosted website!  For most folk, this is probably going to be a boring read.  For others, like beginning webmasters or bloggers, it could at least be a unique read of one fellow blogger's experience.

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Today (5-22-13) I had my primary blog shut down by HostGator. (Again).  Yep, this isn't my first experience getting my site shut down by HostGator.

Disclaimer: As a shared hosting provider, the customer service for most inquiries from HG has been quick and efficient.  Over the last few years, since early 2010, I knew that when I submitted an eticket, I'd get a fairly quick reply.  The HostGator team has been quick , efficient and friendly.

On the down side, I've also submitted etickets 14 times for my website being offline intermittently.  In almost all of those cases, the site was down for mid-day maintenance and usually returned to life within minutes of my discovering it was down.

Yet since December of 2012, my site has been the target of overloaded processes or issues three different times.  In each instance, well, it's been pretty exciting tackling these issues.

And since the beginning of 2013, I get a different vibe from the customer support of this very popular hosting company, which is giving me second thoughts about what I'm doing here, when they keep me waiting from 1.5 to 3 or 4+ hours with replies?

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HostGator was recommended to me by a friend I trust.  And when you look around at reviews of different hosting providers, the organization is usually at the top of the different lists. (Lists compiled pre-2013)  But I'm not sure or recall if those lists are focused on shared hosting.  And one other thing that came to mind today, was another trusted peer who suggested that shared hosting companies tend to have issues develop or make statements that promote their more expensive hosting opportunities.

That came to mind because today while my system warning email was telling me about my issue, one of the potential fixes was to upgrade to a dedicated server.  Can't afford that, but thanks!  (How odd, I thought.)

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Today's issue was:

"This message is to advise you of a temporary block placed on your database. The database associated with the script in "<my database>" was found to be consuming an inordinate amount of mysql connections, to the point of degrading overall system performance."

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Other or past issues:

On 4-21-13 my account was not getting backed up because I had too many inodes (files).  Yes, you do have unlimited bandwidth and disc space.  But you have limits on the number of files you're allowed to have.  I found that to be interesting.

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On 3-12-13:  "I apologize, but I was forced to suspend the directory {***} as multiple scripts inside were causing high loading issues on the server."

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12-18-12:  It appears that a crawler robot (or robots) was causing a high load on the server, and due to this affecting all of the other accounts on the system, we were forced to take immediate action for the health of the server.

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At the time of writing this paragraph, I've been locked out of my site's database for 13 hours.  3 hours ago I submitted my IP address to have access to my database so I can apply one of their recommended fixes.

(I was killing time waiting for a reply by looking around at other shared hosting options.  It looks like I have competitive options out there like InMotion, BlueHost, Hub, and a whole bunch more.  I hate the idea of leaving HG, but my LOW TRAFFIC site that's impacting their server seems to keep having issues over there of late.

{ Here are some of the other options I happened to see recommended out there while tooling around and waiting for responses:

http://www.bluehost.com/
http://www.inmotionhosting.com/
http://www.webhostinghub.com/
http://www.justhost.com/
http://www.site5.com/p/wpb-wordpress-hosting/)
}

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My latest observations, as of when I wrote this section, is that my access to my site has been restricted to me for 24 hours.  And now, rather than at least having a stagnate site up and my not posting to it, the entire site has been taken offline. 

THIS IS NOT the HostGator I first signed up with.  Prior to 2013, if you had an emergency, they seemed to be right on it and rarely kept you waiting.

This year, it feels like a completely different experience.  As if they've changed hands or management.  This could be the cost of company growth.

I looked at my tickets I logged with HG and it seemed that 1 to 2 hour gaps between communications (not something I'm used to):

HostGator Notice:  01:54:27 PM | Mar 12th, 2013
             my reply: 02:01:18 PM | Mar 12th, 2013
HostGator reply:    04:03:45 PM | Mar 12th, 2013
Me:                      04:34:45 PM | Mar 12th, 2013
HostGator Final reply: 05:37:29 PM | Mar 12th, 2013

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Todays fun:

HostGator Notice: 10:28:32 AM | May 22nd, 2013
My reply:              03:04:45 PM | May 22nd, 2013 (Weird time stamp... I contacted them around 7ish my time.)
After using Live Chat to EXPIDITE the process:
HostGator:            11:44:07 PM | May 22nd, 2013
My reply:              12:38:43 AM | May 23rd, 2013
HostGator reply     01:25:54 AM | May 23rd, 2013
My A.M. reply:      08:17:56 AM | May 23rd, 2013

HostGator             11:21 AM | May 23rd, 2013

 

It feels obvious my emergency is not their urgency or even, seemingly on their radar.  But that's my emotional opinion on an alleged presumed situation on their end.  I'm sure they are working very hard on various issues, and mine only being one of them.

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I did notice an interesting tidbit in their latest reply from 9+ hours ago... in that they told me I have too many posts, comments and plugins and that's why my site was causing server issues.

(So first it was a script, and now it's too many posts.)

Yet a few weeks ago I had ripped out a few hundred older posts and was running quite fine until yesterday.  And I never came close to those original post numbers from a few weeks back.

And now that my functionality has returned, they apologized for the wait because they have a high number of tickets today (eh?) and it seems that now, I've been informed that search engine robots were the cause for my issue.  So this malarkey about my database and other things seemed a bit off.  They suggested that I control the robot crawl rates.  Which I did the last time this happened.  And high number of tickets?  Was that the issue for my waiting around last time also?

All just valid questions rumbling around in my mind.

But so be it, I did my best to comply with their issues.

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Days like this really make you think, that's for sure!

Akismet is Good, But It's Not That Good

Akismet is the friend of all bloggers.  It snags suspected spam comments and known spam comments.  And over time, many folk become rather accustomed to it doing its job.

But I found a serious flaw with Akismet that is rather disappointing or maybe could be looked at as annoying.

On a few occasions I've had someone come to the site to be a troll and I just decided enough is enough.  So I told Akismet to spam the user.  Sure enough, next time back it worked on him.  But then he changed how he was signing his comments, and he was getting through the filter again, despite coming from the same IP address his other name came from.

So I spammed that comment.  He changed his user name, again, same IP, and I had to manually remove his troll comment again.  And again, and again and again.  I was getting ready to just spam all blackberry addresses, since this visitor was coming from a Blackberry address, but decided against it.

So the user used different user names and he came in via a few different IP addresses.  Maybe 3 different ones.  I always thought Akismet was IP based, but it seems that maybe its not.

Of course, as a blogger, you could pay the $5 per month and get an API key and then, it would probably go to town on this cretin.  And I may just do that.  I haven't been using it for that long, and overall, it does seem to work.

But I thought you should be apprised.

Chase Bank Wants To Give Your Money To California

The other someone I know got a notice from Chase about a checking account she's held with them for many years.  She hasn't made any deposits or withdrawals from it, but it's always there.

That notice she got informed her that since her account has not had any activity for a period of time, they started quoting CA laws stating that they can turn the money over to the state as unclaimed property.

Serious!

The account is a non-interest bearing account but it's always been there.  And now Chase wants to take her money and give it to the state of California as unclaimed property.

If by chance, you have accounts with Chase, that you think will be there forever and you haven't interacted with, you might want to go check on it!

Now per the laws quoted in the letter, this could impact any bank.  But I also know banks interpret rules and laws differently. 

For instance, I have my own Chase account that requires me to sign in with only one computer.  If I change computers to sign in with, they have me go through hoops to get a "key" to log in from this different computer.  If I go back to that other computer, I have to go through that entire process again.

When I asked why, they quoted new 9/11 RULES that require banks to do this.

But my other bank does not have that rule because I can access it from any computer I want without the hoops.

So if you have what they consider to be a stagnate account, you might want to be aware that they will call it "unclaimed property" and give it to the state.  (Don't worry, they give you plenty of time with their notice, but if you blow off nondescript looking letters, well, don't if they're from Chase!)

Is Google's Blogger Easy Enough To Be Worth It?

Google's Blogger platform, is by all quick references, an ultra convenient, simple, straight forward kind of tool for getting a blog up and running for the newbie.  But is it for you?

If you have any kind of Google account, you can very easily get and create a Blogger account and if you don't have a Google account, it's pretty easy to get and make one.

Now if you're new to the blogging scene, I bet you will enjoy your experience... at first.  It's fun and easy. But as time goes on and you start to understand more about the world of blogging and want to demand more from your blogging platform, opinions start to change.

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Even though I say you may start wanting more, there still are plenty of high-end personalities that use the simplicity of Blogger to get their message out and it works for them.  It's their primary venue.  It connects and posts (integrated) to Google+ quite easily, and with enough tinkering, Blogger posts can be automatically posted to Twitter and Facebook via 3rd party products.

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But Sometimes The Frustrations Dim The Enthusiasm

When you work interactively with blogger and you go live with a post, you then have the option to post the same content straight to your Google+ page for the site.

But if you schedule a post for a later time to go live (I do that often), that doesn't happen.

Blogger used to give you a post to G+" option when you updated a post, but that does not happen any more.

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I don't work in Blogger itself.  I craft my content outside of it (in notepad) then paste the content. (I work in an environment where I can count my words, to make sure I stay above the Google SEO recommended minimum of three hundred words per article.)

Therein lies most of my issues.

Unlike any other blogging platform that I can paste into, Blogger starts to cause issues for me from the get go when I paste.

Once pasted, if I decide I need to add content and try to add lines to the content, the first time I hit 'enter' the linefeed works.  After that, it does not.  I am then forced to hold the shift key while hitting enter.  (Nope, don't know why!)

And sometimes, hitting return to add a line, pops the user down to the last line of the article.  I'm not finding a consistent cause for this, except that it consistently happens.

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Working with images can be pretty easy, if you add only one.  But if you start wanting to add more throughout an article, SOMETIMES, no matter where your cursor is (Which to me, would indicate where you want the inserted image), the image adds itself to the head of the article.

And finding images from your blog is trippy.  When I pull up a list of images from the blog, they're rarely listed visually in chronological order.  So good luck.

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As far as formatting goes, it takes YouTube video links more easily than any other blogging platform.  (Of course... YT is a Google product).  So there's that.

BUT good luck if you use ampersands in your content.  > & < Typing some symbols is a total fail.  (It translates the character into letters...) 'Nuff said there.

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I can cut and paste a draft, but then I can't control the alignment or line feed after that.  It will not respond to right or center align markings and such.  It won't respond to carriage returns.

And I just discovered there's a label limit... have to wonder if this limit is just a limit in blogger, or something to ponder in other blogging platforms and any impact it might have on the web?

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To reiterate... if you're a blogger who is either

• New to the world of blogging
• Has a very simple presentation format
• Crafts your content within your platform
• Isn't too demanding of the interface,

Then Blogger is a pretty awesome tool.

But as you graduate into a more technical blogger, well, it gets a bit tricky after that!  I might even use the word annoying.

But on the bright side, Google makes it very easy to point domains to your blog and they have a ton of other features that can still make it fun for the newbie.  It also, of late, has different options for your appearance of your blog.  Though still, hands down, other platforms rule that aspect.

Me, I'm experimenting right now before I make the final decision to cut my losses with Blogger or keep going.  Because for one thing... it's wonderful to not have to administer the server in the background.  All you have to do is create and go on Blogger.

Sure, you're victim to what ever might happen to the Google servers, but it's rare when they have issues.  Me, right now, on my HostGator shared server, (I love HG), I'm needing to spend time looking things over under the hood.

I'll let you know soon enough what comes of this experiment.  For now, I'm working with it for an extended period of time.  This site here, is my simpler, easy to post to site.  So more than likely, I'm sticking it out.  But I have a few other sites I get a bit more creative with.  And there, is where my (in)sanity lies.

If you have any insights to the matter of using Blogger, by all means, chime in!  I'd love to hear them, as I'm sure the readers would love to see them!

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The Day Thesis Abandoned Me and My Blog

My Happy Time With The Thesis WordPress Theme Might Be Coming To A Crashing Halt!

For the last few years, I've been using the Thesis theme on a different site and I have been pretty happy with it.  Even though it wasn't the most automatic theme to be able to install or update, the instructions were clear and simple.  You do everything right, like back EVERYTHING up, follow the instructions, and you're upgraded.

Thesis has been touted as an SEO efficient template theme for Wordpress.  And I can definitely attest to how paying for a professional theme does wonders for your website in terms of page speed loading, Google recognition, and what not.  I have no complaints what so ever about Thesis 1.85 and earlier.

The control panel is the best. Everything is so simple to go through that it was silly.  Even when I had to learn how to create a few CSS or other code snippets to modify my site, it was not very hard at all.

And when they announced an entirely new, rebuilt version of Thesis, promising even better SEO, I was pretty excited.  I mean, it's been awesome and user friendly up to this point.  Why not jump on the bandwagon?

I signed up for the developer's version early, getting that "early bird" discount and my anticipations started to grow.  But that was part of my problem.  That my excitement levels were pretty high as I settled in to wait, and my expectations built me up and I was buzzing, waiting.

And then release day came and it wasn't out yet.  They were still adding finishing touches.  I don't remember exactly when it came out, but I think it was a few days after the fact.

But who cared, right?  Thesis 2.0 is supposed to be so much better.   And then it came out and I installed it on a different test site I run.

Oh my.  What kind of foreign world have I stepped into?
It seems, like how Google is starting to dis-favor the little guy on the web for the bigger entities, the guys behind Thesis seemed to have redesigned it in such a way that it makes zero sense to the newbie webmaster.  It seems to be designed for people with moderate and above programming experience.

This new interface no longer has template pages or menus that help the user select options.  I have odd looking boxes and in the beginning, very little documentation to support your need for help.

Now, one has to build the site template from the ground up in some blank looking control page that offers nothing for the user to understand.  I now have boxes, packages and skins.  But no options, no questions... just a blank page looking back at me.

On October 2, I was told how to get Thesis 2.0.  Then they launched some basic question & answers.  Yes... they started getting that many questions, that fast.

On October 24th, they started telling us how awesome it will be. 

On December 4th we got a compatibility blog post from DIYthemes.

On December 7th we got a post telling us how "Santa Claus has nothing on Thesis 2.03."

{Update 4-2-13:  That December 7th post, to this date, has been the last post they've put up about the new Thesis.  I'm pretty disappointed that the little guy has been left out in the cold like this.  Time to ponder the Genesis theme!}

Did you notice the how it came out on Oct 2nd and yet, by Dec, well, now it's January, 3 months later, there are still no mention of manuals, no solid help for the uninitiated?

What saddened me even further is that on the posts noted, people like myself were asking about basic help.  In the early stages, folks were referred to some video tutorials.  But like me, many would love to have manuals to go over and not spend the time watching videos, waiting for the right moment we needed to help us set up our websites.

And in the last post over there, I questioned when the little guy would get some basic help.  No response.  Well, unless you count comments being turned off as a response.

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So tutorials did start to populate the support site.  Two months after the release.

That's been a long time waiting for support for those of us who don't have the time to figure things out.  I'm not a full-time guy.  I have a day job and a family.  And now, I'm a bit disadvantaged here.

At least I sent it to a test site.  And oh, BTW, that test site, the traffic has slowly dropped since I installed Thesis 2.0. By about 30%, despite trying to populate it more regularly since installation.

That alone, is pretty interesting indeed.

But when I try to figure things out... well, here's one instruction on "boxes:"

Upload a Box

in Thesis 2

    Upload the .zip file (provided to you by the box's author) via Thesis > Boxes > Select Boxes > Upload Box.
    Once the box has been uploaded and appears in the list of available boxes, select its checkbox to activate it, and then click Save Boxes.

That so doesn't help me.  What the hell is a box?  And back then I could not find what anything is about... I'd love to know what a "box" or "template" or "package" is.

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It's bad enough that Google has slowly been fazing out the little guy when they started restricting access to the lead traffic sources and how their updates have been squashing the little guy in as much as how reporting on other sites original content does one less good than it used to.

Fine, be that way.  I think I'm getting the drift.  Google is making the web a hard-core business site and it will no longer be up for grabs by the little guy.

But I was hoping for some help from the much-touted Thesis framework that promises great things in the world of SEO.  And yet, where I installed 2.0, my traffic has dropped by 30%.  Boo.

And therein lies my issues and how I'm almost being driven back to Google's Blogger platform.  Ease of use, no hollow promises and just a little bit of work on my part, versus trying to understand all the programming needs necessary to adapt to the "latest and greatest" what what I thought would be my salvation from the demise of the personal blogger on the web.

'Nuff Said! 

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Busy Set of Recalls: Toy Scooters, Airsoft, Child Walkers, LED lights and more

This is a Busy Set of Product Recalls today that range from Toy Scooters, Airsoft rifles, Child Walkers, LED lights, snorkel goggles a PAMPERED CHEF hazard (besides me being in the kitchen that is) and more!

Here's the list and I expound on a few of them below.

• Ryobi Cordless Tool Battery Pack [Fire Hazard]
• Hello Kitty City Motor Scooters [Fall Hazard] (Toys R Us)
• Monster High City Motor Scooters [Fall Hazard] (Walmart)
• Jerdon Style Recalls One-Cup Coffeemakers [Hazard]
• Liberty Mountain Recalls Mountain Climbing Lanyards [Risk of Serious Injury]
• Regency Seating Recalls Oakmont Fabric Stackable Chair [Fall Hazard] (the leg welds can break)
• Disco Lights Recalled by Tween Brands [Electrical Shock Hazard]
• The Pampered Chef Recalls Garlic Slicers [Laceration Hazard]
• U.S. Divers Recalls Youth Snorkeling Mask Sets [Laceration Hazard]; Sold Exclusively at Costco (Lens can break under pressure)
• U.S. Divers and Aqua Lung Sport Brand Youth Snorkeling Masks Recalled [Laceration Hazard] (Lens can break under pressure)
• Soft Air USA Recalls Swiss Arms Air Rifle [Injury Hazard] (The safety isn't working)
• White House | Black Market Women's Shoes Recalled by Impo International [Fall Hazard]
• Toys R Us Recalls Imaginarium Activity Walker [Choking Hazard]
• BrightLight Blankets Recalled by IdeaVillage [Burn Hazard] (overheating issue)
• Stuart Weitzman Girls' Cha Cha Boots Recalled by Synclaire Brands [Fall Hazard] (The zippers can tangle with each other, and down you go!)
• LED Light Bulbs Recalled by Lighting Science Group [Fire Hazard]... wait.. what?  LED, fire?
• Yuba Bicycles Recalls Mundo Cargo Bikes [Injury Hazard] (Feet getting caught in rear wheel)
• Aqua Lung Recalls Buoyancy Compensators [Drowning Hazard]
• Magura USA Recalls Bicycle Hydraulic Disc Brakes [Collision Hazard]
• tc electronic Recalls Bass Guitar Amplifier [Electrical Shock Hazard]

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The Hello Kitty City Motor Scooters has an issue where they can accelerate suddenly, tipping the rider off.  (Um, did Toyota make these?)

Stop using the Scooter, disconnect the battery and take it back to Toys R Us for a refund or store credit.

A few bloody noses have been reported.

Alternately, you can also contact the distributor:
Dynacraft; at (800) 551-0032, or at www.dynacraftbike.com, and click on Owners, then select Warnings/Recalls.

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The Monster High City Motor Scooters have the same issue, as they're also from Dynacraft.

You can return the scooters that were sold at Walmart, or contact the distributor.  (See item directly above.)

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The Liberty Mountain Lanyard Recall involves the Easy Go XP Lock Via Ferrata Lanyards, and the elastic webbing can deteriorate over time and hence, can break.

You can contact Liberty Mountain for a refund or replacement, toll-free at (800) 366-2666, or at www.libertymountain.com. Click on "Contact Us" for more information.

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The Pampered Chef Garlic Slicers has a blade that can come off while in use.

You can contact contact The Pampered Chef for a replacement product.

Consumer Contact: The Pampered Chef at productalert@pamperedchef.com or tollfree  at (877) 917-2433.  Or visit www.pamperedchef.com and click on the "Product Alert" tab for more information.

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The Toys R Us Recall of their Imaginarium Activity Walker involves the  Imaginarium Activity Walkers.  There's a small bolt that keeps the front wheels attached, that can come out, and this is deemed as a choking hazard.

You can return it to a Toys R Us store for a refund or store credit or contact them at (800) 869-7787.  Or you can visit www.toysrus.com and click on Safety Information and Recalls for more information.

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The LED Light Bulbs being Recalled by Lighting Science Group have an overheating issue, and are posing a fire hazard.

There have been 68 SIXTY-EIGHT incidents of failure.

For more detailed info, contact Lighting Science Group toll free at (855) 574-2533 or at www.lsgc.com/recall

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The Aqua Lung buoyancy compensators with SureLock II weight pocket handles have issues where the rubber handles can come off as you remove your weights under water, during an emergency.

There have been over 200 incidents.  (No injuries thank god.)

You can Contact: Aqua Lung at (855) 355-7170 or at www.aqualung.com and click on Recall Notice for more information.

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Details (if you want more) on all recalls can be located at the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission (www.cpsc.gov).
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Some SEO Advice and Sales SPAM Fun For Newbie Website Owners

So you need to know more about SEO advice for your website?  Don't we all.  Google has been keeping everyone dancing on what's needed to have any kind of rank on the web, and my suspicions are they're squeezing out the little guys.  But if you're bold enough to want to try, more power to you!

Once you've decided you would like to run a blog of some sort, and it's not for just you and a few people, you probably will start wondering why you only get a few visits at best.  You'll find out that internet or web SEO (Search Engine Optimization) is the first basic step towards snagging website traffic for the edification of your creative mind! (Code for blog posts.)

If you have someone in your life you can tap for a resource in this field of SEO, you're one step ahead of the crowd.  I've had a wonderful mentor of sorts by the name of Vic, and I have appreciated every bit of insight he's provided me.  (I've probably have outstayed my welcome, so I don't pester him too much any more these days.)

SEO is a tricky thing but there are a few things you can do to help yourself in this category if you don't have a knowledgeable peer in your pocket.

Do your research.  Find popular websites and look them over.  Google even has great insights to creating content that could get you more website traffic.  (This is a great insight to getting SEO help, from Google itself)

But one thing I'd suggest is to rely heavily on your own research first, before falling for any traps that want money [Review of GoDaddy's Search Engine Visibility Tool] from you.

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As you start to develop your skills a bit, you'll start figuring out what to weed out of the noise out there.  Don't jump on the first thing or two that sounds good or great.  Remember, sales pitches are designed to make sales.  I laugh now at what I used to jump at when I tried my hand at real estate.  Wow...  and I fell for the pitches because I desperately wanted to succeed.  Now.  (And therein lies the issue...  wanting it now rather than working at it.)

If you find something great looking, back out, and research that product or company and see what folks are saying.

There is one resource that's pretty cool, and that's SCRIBE, but that's a product for a self-hosted wordpress blog and it depends on how much money you might already be making off your site, since it's not a cheap service.  (But it is a good service).  What SCRIBE does is guide you along the lines of what is good or better for specific posts. (If it looks tempting, you have a 30-day free trial I believe, or find a site that reviewed it and sometimes, they might provide discount codes for using their affiliate sales link.)

The one thing you want to do is play above board with Google.  If you try tricky stunts, Google will find you, smack you, and your site will get dinged for it.

For example... at one point I had a linking practice that was netting me good traffic, but I wanted to hide the links so my fans (those are the competitors of mine that constantly steal my ideas for their own posts or practices) wouldn't see what I was doing.  BUT Google doesn't like it when you hide links in your text.  Even though I fixed it, that hurt for about 6 months as my traffic source recovered much more slowly than it had dipped.

So with time and a smart approach, I think you'll get the hang of things.

OH, BTW, if you have started monetizing your site, you might notice the amount of income is directly proportional to traffic flow.  But if you're sharp, and focus your content to who you want and then get an Amazon associates account, you can actually make decent bucks from targeted writing/content.

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But as you get going and your site starts getting noticed, it's going to get noticed by the scum ad and service sellers that will reach out to you to tease you about what golden opportunities there are for your site out there and how much they can help you.

Hold yer britches.  Let's look at the latest sales pitch I've received.

My policy is this:  I do my research.  Then I contact who I have deemed worthy enough for me to consider trusting.  Unsolicited ads usually aren't worth much since they have the time to hunt little 'ol you down, and aren't working with those #1 Google found sites!  Example:  Does Coke or Budweiser email you to try their stuff?

Have fun... my running commentary is in {} brackets and this was in relation to the parent site of this site.

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Brusimm.com Team, {OK, so they got my email address but didn't bother actually reading the content around it or they would know my name.  BOT!!!}

I thought you might like to know some of the reasons why you are not getting enough Social Media and Organic search engine traffic for Brusimm.com  {Because I'm not Fandango, CNN, ESPN... I'm a tiny site that won't get that big.}

1.Your website Brusimm.com is not ranking top in Google organic search for many competitive keyword phrases.
{Duh... and a new site will never be able to compete for the most popular search terms because the top 5,000 blogs are already trouncing me on those terms.  (You have to generate some good, unique content... that DOES work.)}

2. Your website profile is not available in most of the Social Media Websites.
{I assume they means besides Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Google+, Technorati, Alexa, YouTube and the other half dozen sites Brusimm does participate in.  Web BOT!!!  Incredibly STUPID web bot at that.}

3. Your site has 8 Google back links, this can be improved further.
{I guess they missed the other several hundred.  SPAMMER BOT!!!}

There are many additional improvements that could be made to your website, and if you would like to learn about them, and are curious to know what our working together would involve, then I would be glad to provide you with a detailed analysis in the form of a WEBSITE AUDIT REPORT for FREE. 
{OK... then just send it already.  Oh, wait, BOT!}

Our clients consistently tell us that their customers find them because they are at the top of the Google search rankings. Being at the top acleft of Google (#1- #3 organic positions) is the best thing you can do for your company's website traffic and online reputation. 
{I don't know what an acleft is.  But I seriously doubt this ragtag pitch source did that.  Or we'd all have heard about it via other channels.}

I found your site in the Google search and after having a look over your website I think you should go for an SEO campaign to boost your marketing strategy. 
{OK, wait!  I don't rank in Google, but you found me in Google?  Got it... bot.}

Sounds interesting? Feel free to email us or alternatively you can provide me with your phone number and the best time to call you. 
{Sure!  Try 123-456-7890, midnight, your timezone bitch!}

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Best Regards,
Diana {some made up last name}
SEO Consultant  {Technically, that's probably correct.  She just did consult.}
dumbass phone # I'll never call.

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PS1: This is onetime email and you may ask us to "REMOVE" you from our mailing list.  {That I have received for the umpteenth time already}

PS2: I found your site from online advertising but did not click. {I don't advertise online... nice try.}

PS3: We operate 24 x7. I will be happy to send you links to price list,refund policy, client rankings, client testimonials, "How we are different from others?", and "Why should you choose us?" on receiving a response from you  {Hold. Your. Breath.}

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Update:4/4/13:  I got my third "onetime" email from Diana...  cool!!!

Bruce again...  so that's my fun with their noise and I get these wonderful emails all the time now.  If you actually read to this part of the article, here's some bonus bits.  Below are two resource links to get you thinking along the lines of how to look at this thing called SEO and trying to eek out a small corner of the web for yourself.  Have fun and link up with me sometime!

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Update: 4/18/13:  Diana has become Mark Peterson (I guess in case am gender biased) and they're no longer threatening me with the "one time deal" option.  They must have read this piece because they've cleaned up their act on the wording...  it no longer says I don't rank in Google, and then late say, they found me on Google.  The stupid spammers are getting smarter!

Google's Webmaster Guidelines,
Google on Getting SEO Help Suggestions,

How Far Would You Go For Your "Pet?" (LETS HELP HER FIND MADDOX)

That's the question, and one raised by a Yahoo article about a woman and her missing mini Pincher.  How far would you go to find your animal companion?  (If you're in a hurry, just skip to the last paragraph, and how you can help find Maddox.)

If you live in or around OK City, please share, RT, '+' or what have you.  And if you don't, what the heck, maybe you know someone that does.

If you're of the mind that a "pet" is just an animal, you can move along, because this article is not for you.  It's not that I dislike you or your mindset, I just don't understand it.  I don't understand how a creature that obviously has feelings and intelligence, laced with a bit of primal emotions, can be looked down upon as "just an animal."  Just because they don't talk doesn't make them less of a living entity than you or I.

Our "pets," or furry family members (FFMs?) are much like the children of a family.  Even though they can't speak, they show things in other ways.

Sure, some animals aren't that bright.  I have a cat that would probably walk into a burning building to see what's up.  But then again, I've watched people evacuate a building because of a bomb scare and then stand around outside the front lobby door.  So there's no difference there.

And I find it amazing that my ACD can watch something and learn how it works with one viewing.  Or that he has associated words and deeds without training him.  He's learned things faster than some people I know.

And the emotions they have aren't random.  My ACD knows when he's done something wrong.  He knows when someone gets injured.  He knows what to do in each situation, or at least what he thinks he can do.  All without being trained for it.

But this woman in the Yahoo article says it all.
She was worried about leaving her FFM with someone.  Folks mean well, but not all animal owners have the same regard for precaution as others.

I am hyper careful when it comes to how I do things around my dog.  I can't see any general pet-sitter being the same way.  I can't tell you how many times I've heard, "He just got out!" While leaving out the catch phrase, while I stood there with the door open.  (Last week I returned a lost dog to its owner.  I rescued him from the middle of a very busy street.  When I got him home, the owner called him over to him and left him to sit in the front yard.  When I asked if he should put his adventurous puppy inside, he said, "No, he'll be fine."  Are you f*ing kidding me?  I just saved him from playing in traffic over a mile away, but the moron says "he'll be fine.")

In this woman's case, she did choose to leave her pet with a friend.  She went against her own instincts and now she's paying the price no "pet owner" should ever have to deal with.  Never mind that animal's personal, harrowing experience right now.

She left her mini pincher, Maddox, with a neighbor and within the day, Maddox escaped.  The woman cancelled her vacation and has gone on leave from her job to find her life-long friend.  She's taken several extraordinary measures, and yet, 80+ days later, she's still without her FFM.

On the bright side, she's helped locate several other mini pinchers and the Maddox is microchipped!  (If he can be caught.)

This is a horribly sad event. I helped search for a dog in the foothills of my local region a few years ago, spending whole days in the countryside hiking and trying to track down a lost dog, but to no avail.  It's frustrating for me, and for how his humans must be feeling.  I can't imagine how I'd feel if my buddy got out.

Here's how we can help...

"For now, she's relying on determination and the help of strangers to bring Maddox home. If you'd like to help, check out his Facebook and Twitter accounts or his website Bring Maddox Home. Best of luck!"

PS:

I'm going to add a real crazy thought... folks between OKC and his home in CA should keep a look out.  There have been stories of dogs that have traveled great distances to get home.  My grandmother forgot her cat one summer when she headed to her summer vacation house.  The cat traversed the land from Providence Rhode Island and found its way to Leeds, ME.  My jaw dropped when I saw this cat come limping up the driveway a few weeks into the summer season.  So nothing is improbable!!!

ASICS 'Support Your Marathoner' Site Was A Great Premise, But..

When ASICS put up the Support Your Marathoner website and joined it with electronic support for the runners during the LA Marathon, it was a well received idea and I thought it was awesome.  A way for me to support my wife and her sister remotely.

It was a great idea.  But OMG, the execution of the site killed me and now, rather than warm fuzzies about the site, I have nothing but emotions of frustration when I think if the site.

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When my wife sent me a link to Support my Runners, I jumped on it.  But registering for the site was a challenge.

The site seems slapped together and very non-intuitive.  Once I did figure it out, it would not let me register.  It just stared blankly back at me.

The next day I tried again, and bam!, I got to register.  Now, I wanted to go support my wife and her sister.  I first uploaded two pictures for them to see somewhere along the route. And so I registered to support them.

Getting the pics uploaded was painful at best.  It kept cropping what I provided, no matter what I provided in whatever cropped format.  But finally, Whoo hoo!  I'm done.  Or so I thought. 

Remember now, I registered as a supporter.  Or at least, I followed links that indicated for supporters to register as.

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During the run, my wife's sister saw her picture that I uploaded for her but my wife did not see hers.

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I thought I'd go see what happened.  Once I figured out that to see my profile was to click on "My Marathon," things didn't seem right.  Wha???

So after having gone back in to the "http://www.supportyourmarathoner.com/" all I can find are options to fill in my run time and to leave thanks for my supporters.  That alone, seems contradictory to the website name/link.

And later, it seems that even though I signed up for supporting my wife and her sister, they had no supporters.

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I think this idea was brilliant.  The execution needed a huge amount of work to make it intuitive, fun and friendly.

ASICS, premise:  Awesome
Execution: Epic Fail!

Hey marathoners from Los Angeles:  INCREDIBLY WELL DONE... no matter what the time.
Here, check this video out... you might be able to relate and it's damn funny!

Product Recalls for Dressers that Tip (Very Dangerous!), Trampolines and More

Today I thought I'd pass on these very, very important product recalls.  One recall involves a dresser that tips over.  A toddler death has been associated with this recall.  A Walmart trampoline is in the list, and more non-digestable magnets are again on the list.  And there's also a stroller that has a strangulation hazard associated.  Also, there's a very popular over-the-counter flu medicine being recalled due to poison risk.

There's more in the list, so read on and find out!

And first thing's first... as with any recalled product, consumers should IMMEDIATELY stop using the product in question.
Did you know it's illegal to resell products that are being recalled?

And one more "Did You Know" that's actually kind of scary:

"Every two weeks a child dies when a piece of furniture or a television falls on them." Anchor your stuff folks and pay attention to some of these recalls!!!

ALL of the below recalls can be researched for more details at the CPSC website, at [http://www.cpsc.gov/].  In fact, I recommend/urge you to check it out. There are many more recalls to be aware of.

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First up...

Natart Chelsea Dressers Recalled By Gemme Juvenile To Reduce Tip-Over Hazard

A toddler death has been associated with this recall, where the item in question, the Chelsea three-drawer windowed dresser bearing model number 3033, with all its drawers open, can be climbed on by a toddler and then tip over.  A very unsafe situation.

These particular dressers were sold at Furniture Kidz and other ispecialty stores as well as at Baby.com from January 2005 to December 2010 for between $600 and $900.

Gemme Juvenile is offereing free wall anchor kits.

You can contact Gemme Juvenile toll-free at (855) 364-2619, 9 a.m. and 5 p.m. ET Monday through Friday or visit the firm's website at www.chelseawallanchors.com to receive the free wall anchor kit

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Million Dollar Baby Dressers are being Recalled, by Bexco because of Tip-Over Hazards.  Sadly, Two Toddler Deaths have been associated with this recall.  Both suffocations.

The Million Dollar Baby Dressers "involves "Emily" style four-drawer dressers with model numbers M4712, M4722, M4732 and M4742 and similar "Ryan" dressers with the model M4733."

To obtain wall anchor units, you can contact the firm's website at www.themdbfamily.com/safety2 and click on Safety HQ or call toll-free at (888) 673-6652 between 8:30 a.m. and 5 p.m. PT Monday through Friday

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Walmart sold Trampolines being Recalled

Sportspower Expands Trampoline Recall Due to Fall Hazard. They've had nine incidents, with five reports of injury, including broken bones.

The trampoline is called the Sportspower BouncePro 14' Trampolines, and the issue is that the enclosure netting surrounding these trampolines can break, allowing children to fall through the netting and be injured.

You can cContact Sportspower toll-free at (888) 965-0565, from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. ET Monday through Friday, online at www.sportspowerltd.net and click on "Recall Information" at the bottom of the page for more information, or email the firm at customerservice@sportspowerltd.net

They were sold exclusively at Walmart stores from February 2009 through March 2011 for about $300.

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Magnetic Balls Being recalled by SCS Direct because of Risk of Ingestion

SCS Magnet Balls(r) Manipulative Magnet Sets that were sold exclusively on Amazon.com are being recalled because they can be swallowed and if multiple balls get hooked up together while inside a body, they can clamp onto body tissues causing intestinal obstructions, erforations, sepsis and death.

You can contact SCS Direct toll-free at (888) 749-1387, from 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. ET Monday through Friday. Consumers can also email the firm at recall@scsdirectinc.com.

"The recall involves all Magnet Balls(r) The Original and Rainbow Bright interactive magnet sets sold in a cylindrical silver tin. Each puzzle set contains 216 spherical high-powered magnets that are 5mm in diameter. The magnets were sold in silver and multi-color sets."

Though this specific product has no issues reported in association with it, other magnetic sets like this have almost 80 reports of medical attention being sought for ingestion.

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Another magnet recall:

Kringles Toys and Gifts High Powered Magnets recalled Due to Ingestion Hazard.  Again, sold exclusively on Amazon.com

The product is called Nanospheres Magnetic Desk Toys
Contact Kringles Toys and Gifts toll-free at (888) 801-1649 from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. MT Monday through Friday, e-mail customerservice@kringlestoysandgifts.com, or website www.kringlestoysandgifts.com/ and click on Product Recall for more information.

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"Triaminic and Theraflu Products Recalled Due to Failure to Meet Child-Resistant Closure Requirement; Risk of Poisoning"

The child-resistant caps can fail to work and if a child manages to get this product open, risks unintentional ingestion and poisoning.

You can contact Novartis Consumer Healthcare toll-free at (866) 553-6742 from 8 a.m. to midnight ET, Monday through Saturday, or online at www.novartisOTC.com for more information.

There have been 12 reported incidents of young ones getting into the product and one reported case where a child required medical attention.

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Mutsy USA Recalls EVO Strollers Due to Strangulation Hazard

The issue noted is that the opening between the grab bar and seat bottom of the stroller can allow an infant's body to pass through and become entrapped at the neck, posing a strangulation hazard to young children when a child is not harnessed.

The recall includes EVO strollers manufactured between February 2012 (01.02.12) and November 2012 (30.11.12) with the following model numbers: MT12-03, MT12-11, MT12-14, MT12-31, MT12-34, MT12-37, MT12-39, MT12-42, MT12-43 and MT12-48.

You can contact Mutsy USA toll-free at (877) 546-9230 from 8 a.m. to 4 p.m. ET Monday through Friday, e-mail at usa@mutsy.nl, or visit the firm's website at www.mutsy.com for recall information.

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Samsonite is recalling their Dual-Wattage Travel Converter Kits Due to Fire and Burn Hazards

The problem is that the item can overheat if a load in excess of 50 watts is put on the converter while it is in the 50-watt setting.  The overheating poses a fire and/or burn hazard.

You can contact Samsonite; toll-free at (800) 382-7259 from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. ET Monday through Friday; at e-mail recall@samsonite.com or online at www.samsonite.com/recall

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Cramer Recalls Folding Step Stools Due to Fall Hazard

The stools are called the Task*It 1-UP folding step stool and the issue is that the step stool can crack or break and collapse, posing a fall hazard to the user.

Contact Cramer LLC at (800) 366-6700 from 8 a.m. to 4:30 p.m. CT Monday through Friday or visit the firm's website at www.cramerinc.com and click on the recall link.

There have been 14 reports of the stool breaking or cracking and 2 resulting in injury.

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Homelite is Recalling their Electric Blower Vacuums Due to Laceration Hazard.

It seems that these vacuums can suck objects into the unit and those items can pop out through the plastic housing.

Contact Homelite Consumer Products at (800) 597-9624 from 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. ET Monday through Friday, or online at www.homelite.com and click on Safety Notices for more information.

These were sold exclusively at Home Depot stores and online at their website.

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Like the above vacuum recall, OWT Industries is recalling their electric vacuum Due to Laceration Hazard.  These were sold Exclusively at Walmart

The items are called the Expert Gardener Electric Blower Vacuums

You can contact OWT Industries Inc. at (800) 597-9624 from 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. ET Monday through Friday, or online at www.expertgardenertools.com and click on Safety Notices for more information.

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